Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.
-I Peter 5:8, NIV
I am convinced another dynamic is at play with marital infidelity than just the natural.
This does not mean I give cheaters a pass. They are still fully responsible for their own sin (see 2 Corinthians 5:10).
However, I get the sense that cheaters have lost their senses in choosing such self-destructive sin. It is truly self-destructive as any violation of the marriage is a violation against themselves (see Matthew 19:6).
The demonic strikes me as at play.
This warning from I Peter warns us about getting devoured by the devil. When someone is devoured, they are totally eaten by an evil entity. This might be why we only see something or someone completely different than we married as we look into the eyes of our cheater.
They have been devoured by evil.
3/9/22. I read & responded to your post on Chump Lady today.
Yesterday the 1st blogger wrote about
II Timothy chapter 3. I was surprised but delighted to read it. I responded. Plz read if/when you have time. Thx.
I’m “Dogs & Hogs”.
Once I got into a entangled with handful of bloggers because of my belief & written opinion about belief. Afterwards, I decided to keep church & state separate out of respect for CL. Is that right?
How do you approach & handle similar situations? Plz Advise. Thx
Yes, I recognize that passage when thinking of my cheater. It is sadly an apt description of cheaters–especially those who try to hide their moral depravity with religious language.
As far as engaging on CL, I think it is just a matter of personal comfort. She doesn’t seem to mind if we bring up our faith in the comments, of course. That said, I am aware that many who come to the blog have spiritual trauma issues from their experiences with their cheater. So, it is good to remember that their responses may have much less to do with you than their own pain. Hope that helps!
Yes, it helps. I will stay sensitive to Spiritual Trauma as it certainly can
be the reason for hostility and/or attempts to censor.
Easy for bitterness & unforgiveness
to occur after any kind of betrayal.
Easy for unforgiveness to take root,
& take over one’s life. I know this personally.
It’s been a long, hard pull out of that Unforgiveness Trap.
I was first convinced via red-letter words of Jesus that IF I chose to be obedient, THEN forgiveness must happen. It was (when triggered, still is) a real rough spiritual battle in which GOD HELPED LOTS. I could not have done it without Him.
I’m aware that anger is an automatic reaction to betrayal & it’s a healthy part of getting to the truth by eliminating deceptions (including self deception), but it should only be a passing-through step to recovery.
This is why I’m tempted to warn others against this most serious, dangerous tactic of our enemy aka it’s alright to allow hurt to turn to hate.