Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, “Vengeance is mine; I will repay,” saith the Lord.
-Romans 12:19, KJV
I find this verse instructive as it comes to forgiving cheaters.
First, it tells us to release to God our fantasies of taking revenge on our abusers. Many people stop at this point when looking at this verse. They might even use this verse to tell off a “bitter” faithful spouse. But there is more here…
Notice what the verse does not say:
It does not say…
…the wrong never happened.
It does not say…
…God is “fine” with what happened.
It does not say…
…the offense is forgotten.
The verse makes a plea to Believers to let go of offenses trust that God will take care of it. This “taking care of it” specifically includes “vengeance.” It is a promise.
We let go of our right to revenge, and God says that “I will repay.”
I find that oddly comforting. It releases me from the anger and responsibility to set things “right.” I don’t have to ensure justice as I serve One who is Justice incarnate–thus, He is far better at it.
I know In the end God will
put everything right and my unrepentant ex husband and his mistress/wife will have to answer for their sins. But, it appears they have gotten off Scott Free in this life and that troubles my soul.
No cheater truly gets off “Scott Free,” because they have to live with themselves. I know I could not live as if nothing happened if I did what cheaters do, and I would not want to be the type of person who isn’t bothered by abusive cruelty.